The Importance of Building Cairns

I've been hiking mountains as long as I can remember. I grew up at the base of Mount Cabot, the northern-most of New Hampshire's 46 4,000 foot mountains. On the map below, you can see the 90 degree turn where my house was, right where Cummings Brook intersects with Lost Nation Road.

As such, I grew up with an understanding that, once you got above tree line on some of the bigger of New Hampshire's presidential mountains, you were no longer following the blazes that adorned the trailside trees. Instead, you were at the mercy of cairns. Cairns are the piles of rocks that show hikers where to go in order to follow the path. In theory, some once-upon-a-hiker had to have had the foresight to pile the rocks there for future hikers to follow.

Or perhaps the first cairns were left by adventurous souls who simply wanted to leave a trail to follow back down the mountain--a relative breadcrumb trail like that of Hansel and Gretel. Either way, just as I've always loved the trails I grew so familiar with as a young boy, I also have a distinct affinity for cairns and their lasting presence atop some of the most beautiful peaks I've traversed.

I was reminded of cairns last week when I heard two "This I believe" talks, delivered by members of my school's class of 2018. In the first talk, Alex said,

"That view was not the only reward: the journey was...hiking has taught me to...focus on the process, the campaign, the little steps."

Isn't hiking just like life in this way? Yet how often do we simply climb to the summit of a mountain, struggle through the challenges of the journey, ignore the little steps, and remember only the final moment of gratification?

We don't leave cairns for ourselves. We, as a society, don't reflect--in the moment--on the tiny things going right (or wrong) that lead us to the pinnacle.

Georgia delivered her speech after her classmate, and left me with the following:

"I'd never realized how fast something I'd always thought would be there could disappear."

We fail ourselves when we forget to build mental cairns, to highlight and expose ourselves to moments of vulnerability that end up being incredibly fleeting. We put too much stake in our big falls and epic summits while neglecting, as Alex so eloquently noted, "the process, the campaign, the little steps."

Here's to the campaign. To building cairns along the way so others may follow our lead, and so we may find our own way back home.

 And, as always, to learning from the wisdom of our students. 

A Higher Human Standard

I've been thinking so much lately. About everything. You may have been thinking, too. I hope you have. About the pain we feel as we watch each other, and ourselves, fail at being human. I passed a sign that read, "Humane Society" outside an animal shelter the other day and almost burst into tears at the irony.

I don't care any more about anyone hearing or validating my allegiances, perspectives, experiences, or preferences...I just want this to get better for my students, my children, for whoever comes next.

I'm trying to teach my students about the world, but it's getting painful because it feels like I'm fighting a world that wants to be divided...and one that runs counter to my school's mission about recognizing "our common humanity."

The idea that's been tumbling around in my mind is this: we need to reclaim our societal norms. To flip peer pressure on its head. We need to hold each other accountable. But we can't do it from the heights of our haughty and proverbial soap boxes or high horses. We have to start with ourselves by humbly submitting ourselves to the reality that we are all flawed and each of us needs to change if anybody is going to change.

The world won't change. We have to change the world. So here is my proposal:

Today

we live in a troubled world.

It’s a world where our differences have divided us.

Everything has become us versus them.

Nobody is listening.

So nobody is learning.

But

how do we learn to listen?

How do we learn to learn?

The answer is actually simple.

We shift our perspective.

Instead

Of entrenching ourselves in our own beliefs

And allowing the media and society to control

What we believe and how we act...

Instead of waiting to defame our critics, haters, trolls, and naysayers,

We invite

Other human beings to make us aware of our blind spots.

Because we all have them.

All of us.

Just like the athlete who spends time in practice working on their flaws,

we must find the flaws in our own armor

instead of looking to exploit the weaknesses in others.

The future of our collective humanity depends upon it.

But we have to want to change

...we have to want to be collectively better

...to overcome challenges

not people.

Therefore,

We demand

that society-at-large holds us, our sons, our daughters, our neighbors, friends, and foes

to a higher standard.

And we begin not with others,

But with ourselves.

So we don a bracelet, a t-shirt, a hat, a patch, or we simply sign our names beneath a pledge of self-improvement that says,

I want to be better.

I want to see my blind spots.

Please help to gently guide me.

Be my guard rail

And make me aware of that which I cannot see.

We tattoo this on our conscience until it simply becomes a part of who we are.

Where everybody thinks alike,

Nobody thinks very much.

But listening to understand

Those whose views differ from our own

Is the greatest trait we can acquire.

Tomorrow

our children will inherit the world.

They will reap the harvest we sow.

We can shift society toward holding each of us to a higher standard.

But the world will not change.

Society will not change.

Each of us must change.

This isn’t about being perfect.

This isn’t about tearing down people.

It’s about trying to improve humanity by holding a mirror up to ourselves.

By reclaiming the contagious nature of societal pressures

to act and be and see the world through one singular lens.

Nobody learns anything from people who agree with them.

Let’s invite people to help us see our blind spots.

Let’s try to be better

By saying,

Let’s ourselves to a higher human standard

and let it begin with me.